


The Colors of the Spirit

by knightinmourning



Category: Star Trek
Genre: Horses, M/M, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Pre-Slash, Telepathic Bond
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-15
Updated: 2019-03-15
Packaged: 2019-11-18 11:52:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 14,486
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18120272
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/knightinmourning/pseuds/knightinmourning
Summary: “Look, if you’re really that set on staying on board and working through your R&R, you can. But the offer is open. I have a horse and saddle that would be a perfect fit for you, and a couple weeks trail riding is a perfect way to relax after eighteen months in space.”During a shore leave on Earth, Chris drags Spock on a trail ride in the Rocky Mountains. They get more than they bargained for, and revelations are made about their feelings for each other.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> First Fic! Titled from an Emerson quote.
> 
> I rewatched "The Cage" recently after last week's Discovery ep, and was absolutely enamored by Mary Lou and Tango. I've been itching to explore Pike, Spock, and their relationship for a while, and this fic was born. Enjoy!

“C’mon Spock. It’ll be fun. Besides, what else do you have to do while we’re on Earth?”

 

“The sensor logs from Sector 59 contain a number of anomalies that require closer...”

 

Captain Chris Pike looked up at his science officer, studying his stony face as he talked about how interesting and curious their latest set of sensor readings were. Waiting a few seconds into Spock’s explanation, Chris cut him off. “Look, if you’re really that set on staying on board and working through your R&R, you can. But the offer is open. I have a horse and saddle that would be a perfect fit for you, and a couple weeks trail riding is a perfect way to relax after eighteen months in space.”   
  


“I... appreciate the offer, Captain.”

 

“Give it some thought, okay? We still have two days until we reach Earth, so you can spend some time digging into those sensor readings before our shore leave officially begins.”

 

“Thank you, sir. I’ll do that.” Spock left the captain’s ready room and headed to the turbolift, focus wavering between the task at hand, his reports from Sector 59, and the captain’s offer. Though he’d spent a number of years on Earth as a young adult, the vast majority of his time had been dedicated to living and working in large population centers like Los Angeles, Beijing, and Rio de Janeiro.

 

Earth’s natural beauty was well-spoken of among the human starfleet officers who had grown up there, and Spock was also aware that many officers enjoyed the very human hobby of  _ camping _ .

 

Other species had pilgrimages and migrations. They cooked their meals on a fire, hunted for their food, and made long treks to places where food was more widely available, or to places with religious meaning.

 

But humans were the only ones who took long trips to nowhere and subjected themselves to the horrors and difficulties of a life outdoors purely for pleasure. And even then, it seemed, that some Earth cultures were more fond of it than others. An oddity, to be sure.

 

Reaching his quarters, Spock turned his attention to the next concern he had with his captain’s offer: horses. He’d never ridden before, and there weren’t really any animals on Vulcan that boasted particular similarities to Earth’s horses. And while he was sure that the captain’s horses were well-trained, it was the more logical solution to study up on riding techniques before putting himself on the back of one of those creatures.

 

...Assuming he was even going, of course. Which he hadn’t decided yet. And it would be a waste of time to read up on horses if he wasn’t going.

 

Spock grabbed a padd from his desk and settled onto the small, grey couch in the corner of his quarters. Even if he wasn’t going to start reading now, that didn’t mean it wouldn’t be prudent to add a few books on it to his personal library from the ship’s database just in case. It would cut down on time he’d need later.

 

Scrolling through the list, he found a variety of books over a period of centuries and a selection of different styles. He select a couple each on different types of riding, as well as a few on horse anatomy and physiology and psychology, as well as a novel with excellent reviews from the 19th century titled  _ Black Beauty _ .

 

For now, though, Spock had other duties to attend to. He stood from his couch and moved to his desk, where he logged into his computer. Bringing up the readings from Sector 59, he started reviewing them, looking for anything that might be out of the ordinary.

 

Sector 59 was particularly interesting because of the telemetry readings they’d received from one of it’s stars, a red dwarf that appeared to be aging at a faster rate than expected. Initial readings suggested that something else in the system was siphoning off fuel from the star, but so far they hadn’t found a possible cause. As the Enterprise had just been passing through the system on their way to an outpost a few light years away, they’d had enough time to grab some readings but not enough to stop and study it in depth.

 

The importance of the readings would be for the next ship that went near the system. With any luck it would give them a chance to better understand what was happening, and jumpstart their research.

 

After a few hours, there was a chime at the door. “Come,” Spock said, giving permission for whoever was on the other side to enter his quarters.

 

The door slid open, and the Enterprise’s CMO, Dr. Philip Boyce, stepped in. Spock turned to address him.

 

“Doctor. What can I do for you?”

 

“I hear you got the same offer I did, Spock.” Boyce said, taking a seat on the couch and leaning forward to rest his elbows on his knees.

 

“Offer?” Spock raised one eyebrow.

 

“From the captain. He’s been trying all week to find someone to go with him. I told him I’m too old, and apparently Commander Una is allergic to horses. I think you’re his last option.”

 

“I told the captain I would consider his offer-”   
  


“Go, Spock. He needs this vacation, and getting out into nature would be good for you, too. And anyway, considering his ‘no technology on the trail’ nonsense, the fact that he’s at least willing to bring someone else with him means there’s a chance that he’ll survive this damned trip.”

 

“Doctor, if you’re so concerned about his health, then perhaps you should-”

 

“Too old, Spock. You ever ridden a horse before?” Boyce leaned back, resting against the couch.

 

“I have not.”

 

“Assuming I could even get into the saddle, the first hour or two would probably be okay. After that? Not so much. Old bones and muscles aren’t built to sit in that position for long periods, and certainly aren’t made for the turbulence that goes with riding on a quadruped. A whole week of it and I won’t be standing anymore.”

 

“Perhaps you could give the commander a hypo for her allergy.”

 

“Or I could just put an note if your file that you’re to be taken off duty until you complete some prescribed shore leave.” Boyce gave Spock a half-grin as the latter’s eyebrows furrowed.

 

“I don’t believe that would be a legitimate use of your power as the ships CMO, Doctor.”

 

“Neither is giving Chris a shot of whiskey after a hard shift, yet I find myself doing it a few times a week these days, Lieutenant. He’s struggling and he needs this trip. Do it.” Boyce rose from the couch and strode from the room, leaving no room for additional comment. Spock watched the door slide shut behind him, pondering the conversation he’d just had.

 

It seemed that he had little choice than to accept the captain’s offer, then. Though he’d been aware of his superior’s struggles since before the Talos IV incident, he had been under the impression that the captain was doing well enough. He had completed a Starfleet-mandated month of psychiatric sessions and evaluations after Talos IV, and had been declared competent for duty.

 

The drinking was a new revelation, however, and Spock wasn’t sure how long it had been going on or how serious it was. A shot after shift once in awhile hardly counted as a drinking problem, but Dr. Boyce seemed to imply that it was more severe than that. 

 

Regardless, Spock was more clear now that this was less about getting him off the ship and more about helping Captain Pike. And though Spock would not claim any emotional attachment to his colleagues, even his captain, it would be logical, for the good of the ship, to ensure that their leader was in top condition. And if that meant going on spending a fortnight on a trail ride so the man didn’t die alone in the wilderness, he would not hesitate to serve that role.

 

Saving his place in the telemetry readings, Spock turned back to the padd he’d used earlier. It seemed it was time to read up on horses after all.

 

***

 

Two days later, the Enterprise had reached Earth and Spock was packed as well as he could be for two weeks in the Rocky Mountains. Carrying his bag to the transporter room, he found the captain already waiting for him, a similar, if smaller, pack beside him.

 

“Ready to go, Spock? We’ll beam down to the visitor’s center and then hike to the stables from there. I asked my family to send Tango and Mary Lou ahead of us, so they’ve been there a couple of days already, getting acclimated to the elevation.” Chris was barely containing a grin, and his eyes were shining. This was the happiest Spock had seen him in a long time.

 

“Yes, captain. I... am looking forward to our trip.”

 

“That’s the spirit, Spock! We’ll get set you up with a saddlebag like mine when we get on the ground and introduce you to Mary Lou - she’s the quieter one, not that either of them are too rambunctious - so you two can get to know each other a little before you have to spend every waking moment together for the next two weeks.”

 

They both stepped up onto the platform and Chris said, “engage.” Seconds later, the familiar feeling of the transporter was a familiar wave across Spock’s body as the transporter room disappeared and forest materialized before him. Looking around, he took in the glory of the Rocky Mountains for the first time, high points rising up in the distance with pine trees standing tall in the foreground. The sky was blue, darker and fuller it seemed than the sky over the cities Spock had frequented in the past. The air was crisp and clean, and there were birds soaring overhead.

 

It was an incredible contrast to the hot, barren desert of Vulcan. Spock could understand why humans believed places like this to have healing qualities on the mind and body.

 

“Beautiful, isn’t it?” Chris said, catching Spock’s observing gaze. Spock nodded.

 

“C’mon. Stables are a couple miles that way.” And with that, they were off. Spock was suddenly aware that he was underdressed for this time of year. He had opted for lighter fabrics, thinking that in late April they had to be approaching summer in this part of the world, but it seemed that winter was lingering longer than expected this year. They passed another pair of hikers heading in the opposite direction and Spock overheard part of their conversation:

 

“Can you believe they’re expecting a big snowstorm up here on Thursday? It’s nearly May, you’d think they’d be getting thunderstorms, not snowstorms.”

 

“With our luck it’ll be a thundersnow. I can’t believe the temperature dropped to 20 degrees last night.”

 

Their voices faded behind him, but he made a note to keep his thermal jacket towards the top of his pack when he switched to the saddlebag. No point in suffering more than he had too.

 

Chris and Spock continued walking along a gentle slope, the trail marked by red blazes. Despite the incredible technological advancements of the human race in the past couple hundred years, this place stayed wild and tech-free. There were airspace restrictions around them, as well as restrictions as to what buildings could go in certain areas. Wilderness areas like this were the last on Earth that didn’t have electricity and running water. Spock wondered again at humanity’s attachment to these places in particular.

 

_ They ravaged their planet, they decimated their own people, but when the dust settled and they had to decide what was really important to them, one of the first acts they passed was reaffirming their dedication to the beauty of their world. _

 

Spock knew this hadn’t always been the case, that there were periods of human-caused extinctions, habitat loss, and climate change. But since the third world war, so many things had changed in Earth’s culture. Like Vulcans, humans had found themselves only after nearly destroying themselves.

 

“So, Spock, have you ever ridden before?” The captain’s question pulled him out of his ponderings and back to the trail.

 

“No, sir. We have a few pack animals on Vulcan, but nothing quite like the earth horse.”

 

“You were on Earth for several years, though, right? Never took the chance to ride then?”

 

“I was focused on my work.”

 

“You can’t tell me you never took a break during the entire four years you were at the academy.”

 

“Of course I did. However, my fellow cadets felt I needed to experience LA’s nightlife, rather than the wilderness of the Rocky Mountains. I spent considerable time in the school gardens as well”

 

“Well, everyone had to have their priorities, I guess. Anyway, we’ll be riding western, on well-broke horses and good tack, so there won’t be much of a learning curve. Just hop on and point her at a trail head, and Mary Lou will get you to the other side.”

 

“You mentioned they were your horses, sir?”

 

“Drop the sir, Spock. We’re on vacation, you can call me Chris. And yes, Mary Lou and Tango are mine. Right after the academy I was a test pilot for a while, so I was able to get both siblings about a year a part, and spent my summers and free time training them. These days I let my nieces ride them and do all the upkeep while I’m at space, and when we come home I try to spend as much time riding as I can. You know I’m not one to espouse old sexist gender ideals, Spock, but little girls and horses are always a sure combination.”

 

“Then why not take them with you? It sounds like they really love to ride.”

 

“Yeah, but there’s two of them and they’re getting big. I’m not going to do that to Mary Lou, make her carry both girls and all their kit for two weeks. You’re lighter than the combined weight of the two of them, and you pack lighter, too.”

 

Spock nodded. He wouldn’t pretend to understand why human girls were more interested in horses than boys were, or the logistics of deciding who to take on a ride (couldn’t they have just gotten another horse?), but the captain - Chris - had clearly thought this through. He wondered if all that reasoning had happened before or after he’d gone around asking his half senior staff to come riding with him.

 

As they continued, they continued the conversation about the horses and Chris’s childhood in California. As he told Spock about the terraforming around his small hometown of Mojave to make it less like the desert from which it borrowed its name, there was a clearing in the trees and a small, rustic stable rose before them.


	2. Chapter 2

In contrast to the concrete and metal of the cities to which Spock was accustomed, the stone and wood structure serving as a home to the trail horses of the mountains seemed particularly old and fragile. He thought of the large snowstorm predicted to reach them the next night and wondered again at their chances of surviving.

“Chris, the snowstorm the hikers we passed mentioned is supposed to hit the area tomorrow night. Perhaps this isn’t the most well-built structure for such weather.”

“Nonsense, Spock. We’ll be fine, and we’ll be on the trail at that point anyway. There are places to sleep every 10 or 20 miles, so if we hit bad weather, we can bunk up for the night. Stop worrying.”

“Dr. Boyce informed me that you had a strict no-technology rule for this vacation.”

“Nature is nature, Spock. If we get into trouble, we’ll either get ourselves out, ask for help, or ride until we reach safety. No problem. Now, let’s go meet our noble steeds, shall we?” Chris put a hand on Spock’s shoulder and smiled at him, as if he was trying to reassure him that this was a good idea and he shouldn’t back out now.

The logical thing of course, would be for both of them to back out, but given that that particular option was not forthcoming, it seemed Spock would have to continue on with his captain.

The large barn doors on the board side of the stable were already open, so when Chris and Spock reached them, they were able to walk right in. Just inside was a young teenager, pitching dirty hay into a wagon in an empty stall.

“Excuse me, I’m Chris Pike, my family dropped my horses off here a couple days ago?”

“Pike? Don’t remember seeing that name on the list of owners. What’re their names?”

“Tango and Mary Lou.”

“Oh! Captain. That’s right. They didn’t put your name down, just told me they belonged to the Captain of the Enterprise.”

“Well I’m going to be masquerading as a cowboy for a few days, alright? No need for the Captain title. Just call me Chris.”

“Yeah, of course. Give me a sec to finish up and I’ll walk you done to them, okay? They’re doing great. Really beautiful pair.”

“Thanks. They’re a joy to work with.”

The teen finished up with the stall and pulled the cart inside. They locked the door as they stepped out and then got a good look at the pair for the first time. It didn’t escape Spock’s notice that their gaze immediately landed on his ears.

“Wait, are you a Vulcan? We never get Vulcans around here. For that matter, we barely get anyone who isn’t from Earth around here.”

“Chris requested I accompany him on this ride. As I haven’t ridden before, I thought it would be a good learning experience.” Spock said, with a raise of his eyebrows. He could practically sense Chris’s eyes on him, watching him as if he knew that Spock wasn’t being entirely truthful.

He doesn’t need to know that the good doctor bullied me into joining him, and this child certainly doesn’t need to know that either.

“Well, I know Vulcan’s don’t like, enjoy things like humans do, but I have you have a good time. Riding’s really fun, you’ll see, especially on a pair like the Captain’s got.”

They walked down a maze of hallways lined with stalls until they reached an area in the back with fewer horses. “Here we go, Tango’s over there, and Mary Lou’s here. Before you head out, make sure you register an itinerary and emergency contacts with us. We’ll be your first point of contact if something happens.”

Chris nodded. “I’ll have it for you later tonight. Thank you for your help.”

“No problem. I’ll be around if you need anything.” The teen left, heading back the way they came.

Now alone, Chris went over to the stall containing Mary Lou, stocky horse with a square body and bright eyes. Opening the door, he stepped inside, pulling a treat out of his pocket and slipping it into Mary Lou’s mouth in the process. “Come here, Spock. Meet your new travel companion.”

Spock stepped forward. He wasn’t afraid of horses, that would be foolish, but he was also well aware that many of the books he’d read in the past couple days suggested avoiding being in a small, enclosed area with a horse, on the chance they might try to kick you. And with the captain already in the cramped stall, it seemed like it may well be one too many if he entered as well.

“She won’t hurt you, Spock. Come on. Here, take this treat, you’ll be instant friends.” Chris pulled another small treat from his pocket, and Spock glanced down at it. It was pink, and with a smooth texture on the sides. Approaching the doorway, he reached his hand out, treat resting along his palm as Mary Lou took a step forward to reach it.

“She is beautiful,” he said softly, trying not to spook the animal.

“That she is. They don’t usually make them like this anymore, but there are still a few old bloodlines that maintain the core of what made quarters great, centuries ago. They’re a specialty now.”

“What’s the difference?”

“Between old and new? The old ones are the sort of horse you associate with cowboys. They’re quiet and well-built. The new ones are lanky with high energy. The sort of thing you want on a track, but could get you killed on a trail.”

Spock considered this as he reached up to pat Mary Lou’s neck, which was coming into reach as Mary Lou continued to check him out, sniffing his chest and pockets. Chris laughed, “Sorry girl, but I’m the one with the treats. Spock doesn’t have any more,” and then he turned to Spock, “you good here for a moment? I’m going to go say hi to Tango.”

Spock nodded, focused more on Mary Lou.

Vulcans are touch telepaths, and though humans usually reduced that ability to mind melds, Spock knew a little of the old beastmasters, who used their abilities to soothe, interact with, and train a variety of animals on Vulcan. As a child, he had taken advantage of some of these practices in a rudimentary way to train his pet sehlat, I-Chaya.

Now, as he ran a hand down the slick fur of Mary Lou’s neck, he reached out as well with his mind, gently touching her consciousness with his own.

Animals thoughts were simpler than sentient beings. Spock adjusted his stance and grounded himself, squaring his feet with his shoulders as he felt Mary Lou’s conscious meet him halfway.

It was different from mind melding a sehlat, that’s for sure.

I-Chaya’s thoughts had always been fast and eager, even in her sleep. Always on the go, even when she was just resting beside him. When they went off together, exploring the area around their home, her thoughts had been a tether to make sure he could always find his way back.

Mary Lou on the other hand, was calm and relaxed. She was content to stand and wait. Prior to reaching out, Spock had been dimly aware of Chris’s voice across the hall, talking to Tango and offering him treats, just as he had Mary Lou. Now that they were connected, however, Chris’s voice was in sharp focus.

More than that, he could feel Mary Lou’s affection for the beings around them. It wasn’t quite a feeling of family, like he would expect from a human, but rather one of...

Herd. That’s what it was. He’d never melded with a herd animal before, never experienced this type of consciousness. He was suddenly intensely aware of the herd hierarchy, Chris at the top, his conscious standing large, quiet, and calming, a bright blue above everything else, then Tango, young and bright, shining red like his coat, and Mary Lou, older and calmer, a shimmering purple, content to stick to the bottom. It was almost as if the three of them had a telepathic connection to each other, though Spock was unaware of any evidence that Earth horses were telepathic. Spock was an outsider here, not that Mary Lou seemed to mind as long as he had treats.

Which he didn’t. Spock pulled his hand away, severing the bond between them, and Mary Lou sized him up one more time before turning to Chris and Tango, whinnying at them with a low voice.

Chris’s head popped up from behind the barrier of the stall. “Everything okay over there?”

“I believe everything is fine, sir.”

“Don’t call me sir, Spock.” Chris unlocked the door of Tango’s stall and returned to Spock and Mary Lou. “Getting along okay you two?” He asked, slipping Mary Lou another treat.

“Yes, I believe Mary Lou and I will get along fine.” Spock patted her neck again as he said it, feeling comfortable with the idea of travelling by horse for the first time since Chris’s initial offer.

Chris backed Mary Lou up so that she was back in her stall completely, and then locked her in. “Well then, let’s let these two rest up for the evening and head to the lodge. I could use some dinner.”

***

Later than evening, Chris sat in the lounge of the lodge adjacent to the stable. Decorated with rustic wood finishes, hunting trophies, and green furniture, it was comfortable and welcoming.

Or at least it would be, but he very quickly learned that the furniture was not as well-cushioned as it looked from afar. Shifting in his seat, he tried to find a position where the frame of the chair didn’t dig into his thighs or seat.

It turned out that the trip itinerary and emergency contact forms were more detailed than Chris had been expecting. Having grown up in an area surrounded by green park land, he was used to taking day rides and picnic lunches without telling anyone where he was going. On the occasion he did a longer trip, it had always been enough to let a parent or sibling know where he was going and when he’d be back.

These forms, however, were asking for all sorts of nonsense. Where you intended to camp or stay every night, who your veterinarian was, who your general physician was, two emergency contacts, a list of medical issues and prescription medications, how you could be reached on the trail, and more.

Legal liability takes the fun out of everything.

Chris filled out everything he could to the best of his ability, skirting around the questions for Spock as best as possible (so what if he didn’t actually know Chris’s parents? They could still be his emergency contacts), and adding the Enterprise’s comm frequency along a trail-side comm number. 

He wanted to minimize technology on the trail, but he wasn’t about to go off without any way of contacting the outside world, in case the worst happened to him and Spock. There had been too many stories growing up of people who wandered off into the desert and got lost just outside town, unable to find their way back and without a comm device to bring help to them

When they’d shown up at the lodge about an hour ago, they’d taken dinner together, in companionable silence, before Spock had retired to his room to pack his new saddlebag and meditate, and Chris had settled in with a padd to fill out the paperwork.

Chris was glad that Spock had agreed to come. He wasn’t quite sure where the change of heart had come from, and certainly doubted Spock’s story that he was doing it for the experience, but seeing him with Mary Lou had confirmed to Chris that Spock would find horses agreeable companions, and would come to enjoy the experience.

And anyway, Chris wouldn’t have been able to do the trip without him. Boyce had insisted that if Chris was going to go on a long trip during this shore leave, he take someone.

Of course, Chris had asked him first, hoping his old friend would be eager to get back in the saddle. When Boyce had turned him down, Number One had been the next thought, but she claimed allergy as the reason she couldn’t come.

Chris didn’t even know you could be allergic to horses.

With the two of them unwilling to join him, Spock had been the third option. Not because he didn’t like Spock, or he didn’t want him around or whatever. He’d just figured that this wasn’t exactly how Spock would want to spend his leave.

And he’d been certain he was right about that, the way Spock had acted in response to the initial offer. But something had changed in the meantime, and Chris wasn’t entirely sure what it was.

His science officer had always been something of a paradox to him. Ostensibly emotionless, Spock possessed a warmth and care that ran contrary to the stony Vulcan exterior he often displayed. Chris appreciated his skills and sense of duty, of course, but even more he’d come to appreciate Spock as a friend and a confidant.

This trip felt like an extension of that, regardless of the reason Spock had decided to come with him. Things had already been bubbling up before Talos IV, as he dealt with the aftermath of a landing party gone wrong, seven people, members of his crew, dying in the process.

And then after Talos IV....

Well, the dreams that kept him up at night where probably just dreams. That didn’t stop the lingering feeling that he was still there, living the illusion. Boyce’s whiskey helped, and so did a hypo or two of sedative, on the worst nights.

He hadn’t brought any of that with him on this trip. The last thing he wanted was to worry Spock with a pack full of liquor and drugs. Hopefully, he wouldn’t instead worry him with cries and screams.

Putting the finishing touches on the trip itinerary, two weeks in the woods starting tomorrow morning, Chris rose from the chair, enjoying the return of feeling to his legs, and dropped the padd off at the front desk of the lobby in the adjacent room. Task complete, he headed up the stairs and to the room he was sharing with Spock.

Opening the door with the code given to him at the front desk, he entered to find Spock sitting cross legged on the floor, apparently deep in meditation. Having learned long ago to leave a meditating Vulcan alone, he instead grabbed a towel from the shelf near the adjoining bathroom and treated himself to a shower. 

The water ran over his head and down his back, warm and soothing after the day’s hike (easy) and the lounge chair from hell (substantially less easy). He wondered for the first time if perhaps, like Boyce, he was getting a bit too old for this sort of adventure. Maybe it was getting to be time to take the promotion to admiral Starfleet offered him every few months.

After a few minutes basking in the comfort of the water, Chris grabbed a small bottle of shampoo on the ledge by his elbow and slathered a bit between his palms. He ran his shampoo-coated fingers through his hair, working the soap deep to his scalp.

They would have much in the way of grooming supplies on the trail, and certainly no running water, so Chris had packed light in terms of styling products. His usually slicked back, well-kempt hair would be a mess soon enough, so as far as he was concerned there was little point in delaying it any longer.

He took a couple more minutes to wash away the shampoo and to soap and clean the rest of his body, and then Chris turned off the water and stepped out of the shower. He towelled off and slid on a knee-length robe before opening the door and returning to the main part of the room.

Spock was up from his meditation, sitting on his bed and reading a padd. He looked up as Chris entered, but quickly returned his attention to the tablet in his hands.

Chris checked the time, 2030. Still early. He changed quickly, and looked over to Spock. “What do you say we head down to the bar and grab a drink?”

Spock met his eyes, not speaking for a few seconds before responding, “If you wish.”

Chris gave a little laugh. “You do know you don’t have to do things here just because I want to, right Spock? We’re adults, we don’t have use the buddy system.”

 

“I am aware. It would... be my pleasure to share a drink with you.”

Chris let the matter dropped, and the two of them headed back to the small bar housed in the room on the other side of the lobby from the lounge. They had taken dinner there, earlier, but it had been deserted. Given the time of year, there were few other vacationers yet at this elevation. Now as they approached, they could hear voices inside indicating that though there may not be many people staying at the lodge, a number of them had opted to spend their evening drinking.

Spock headed towards a corner table for the two of them to sit at while Chris headed up to the bar to order a whiskey for himself and a tea for Spock. When the bartender placed the two drinks in front of him, he grabbed one in each hand and headed to the table Spock had claimed.

“Tea for you, whiskey for me. Just like always.”

“Thank you.”

They sipped their drinks for a while in silence, each lost in their own thoughts. Eventually Chris turned to Spock. “So tell me, Spock. What made you decide to join me here?”

“I’m not quite sure what you mean. As I mentioned earlier, I was interested in learning about horses.”

“Right, purely scientific purposes. Very Spock. And entirely not what changed your mind. So, what was it?”

“I’m not at liberty to disclose.”

“Boyce put you up to it, didn’t he? Did that crotchety old doctor threaten you, Spock?” Chris had a big smile on his face, already anticipating Spock’s response.

“He didn’t threaten me. He merely... brought context to the situation.”

“What he did was tell you I was depressed as hell and downward spiralling and that I would get myself killed out here if someone wasn’t here to watch me.”

Spock nodded, eyebrows raised. “Yes, more or less.”

Chris swallowed the rest of his whiskey in big gulp and let out a laugh. To Spock it sounded almost pained. “Well I appreciate your concern, Spock, and I’m glad you’re here, but I think it’s only fair to tell you that I’m perfectly fine. Not suicidal, not depressed, not about to waste away on a mountain in the middle of nowhere. I promise.”

“With all do respect, you are the one who taught me that there is nothing wrong with reaching out and asking for help. I am... glad to be here, and to provide whatever support I can to a friend.”

“You’re a hell of guy, Spock. Look, we’re going to have an awesome time out there. You won’t regret it, and you’ll see, I’ll be okay.”

They continued at the bar for a while, Chris pausing in his drinking to take on some college kids at the pool table, before they both decided it was late enough to turn in for the night.


	3. Chapter 3

It was a bright, beautiful morning, as Spock suspected it often was up in the Rocky Mountains. Chris and him had woken up at 0800 sharp, with Chris apparently nursing only a mild hangover. They agreed to take their breakfast on the trail and headed down to the stables to set out.

 

Spock had always appreciated Chris’s ability to take charge of a situation and be firm when he needed to be, but also know when he needed to step back and take a more gentle role. Today, he exercised this well, as he tried to teach Spock all the steps to saddling a horse. Tango was all set to go, Chris having used him to demonstrate, but now it was Spock’s turn.

 

“Alright, you’ve got the saddle pad on in the right spot. Now for the saddle itself.” Chris was saying, as Spock walked over to the gate on which they’d tossed the saddle earlier in preparation of this moment. He hoisted the saddle into his arms and returned to Mary Lou.

 

_ Here’s hoping I get this right, or else you forgive me for getting it wrong. _

 

He hoisted the saddle up and over her back, setting it down not quite centered on the saddle pad.

 

“Up higher, Spock. We don’t need you sliding off her rear.”

 

On a second try, he got it up several inches, nearly onto her mane.

 

“A bit lower now, you don’t want it to pinch her shoulders”

 

One more time, and it seemed he had it right. Receiving an affirmative response from Chris, he moved on to the next step: tightening the cinch.

 

“Well done, Spock. Now, don’t forget to walk a bit and then tighten it again. It can come loose while you ride and then you’ll-”

 

“Fall off. I’m starting to understand the consequences.”

 

“At least you don’t have to worry about her bucking you off. She wouldn’t dare, as well as she’s taken to you.”

 

“Indeed.” Spock led Mary Lou around in a large circle before redoing the cinch, which had in fact come loose. When he finished with the saddle, he attached his bags, and turned back to Chris.

 

“You’ve got your saddle on, now let’s get you into it. Before that, crash course on riding. Hand-reining: turn left by draping the reins to the left, do the opposite if you want to turn right. Tug towards you, alternating hands to back up, and pull back with both hands together if you want to stop. Go forward by pressing - not kicking, just pressing - your feet into her sides. And be aware of your head, she can feel its weight shift and will go in the direction you’re looking if you aren’t careful about keeping even.”

 

Spock nodded, suddenly aware that all the reading he’d done on riding had been a waste, and listened intently to his captain’s explanation of how to mount his steed before attempting it on his own.

 

It turned out getting into the saddle from the ground was the easy part, Spock knew he wasn’t hurting for the body strength required to lift himself up. The real struggle came in getting his left foot into the other stirrup. Reaching down with his left hand to assist, he shifted his weight and Mary Lou, unaware of his current struggle, started walking, turning to the left with his movement.

 

Surprised by the sudden movement, Spock sat upright, fumbling for the reins. To his right he could hear Chris approaching him on Tango, one hand up as he commanded “whoa” to Mary Lou.

 

Chris came round to his left side. “Here Spock, I’ve got it. You just hold those reins right now. You’ll have plenty of practice coming up.” He gently took hold of Spock’s booted foot and slid it into the stirrup.

 

“Now, keep those heels down and you should be good to go. Onward!” He dropped his head a fraction of an inch and pressed on Tango’s sides, demonstrating to Spock exactly how to make “onward” happen. Spock copied, following him towards the trailhead on the other side of the clearing. Today’s trail was marked with blue blazes, rather than the red of the walking trail yesterday.

 

As they started down the trail, it quickly became apparent that they were quite early in the trail season, riding or otherwise. Though there was little ice, and the trail appeared well-maintained and wasn’t very muddy, there were tracks in the trail ahead, and there were branches down over parts of the trail. Nothing so big or low that they couldn’t go around or under it, but enough so that they had to stay alert.

 

It was slow going as a result, though they were in good spirits as they stopped to rest and have lunch in the early afternoon.

 

“Sandwiches and trail mix. This brings back memories.” Chris said as he leaned against a tree in a clearing by the trail. “I used to do this every day in the summer, growing up in Mojave. I know they didn’t have horses for trail rides on Vulcan, but did they at least have picnic lunches”

 

“We would occasionally eat outside, though typically it was in the gardens near the house.”

 

“A picnic is a picnic, Spock. Doesn’t matter how far you are civilization. It still clears the mind and soothes the soul.”

 

“Indeed.”

 

They continued talking on and off while they ate, mostly about nothing, or about the ship and her ongoing mission. The day had been quiet so far, and with word this morning that the snow storm they’d heard about yesterday would hit to their north, Spock was content the knowledge that, at least for the moment, the road ahead seemed clear and easy.

 

***

 

Later that afternoon, Chris and Spock were riding through a meadow when Spock felt something wet on his nose. A few more drops followed, and within minutes, they had gone from a nice, sunny day, to a downpour.

 

The meadow was large, and in the mountains, rain often means accompanying thunder. The last thing they needed was to be caught out in this clearing, the tallest things around, when lightning struck.

 

“Head for the trees. We’ll hole up for a bit once we’re under cover.” Chris shouted back to him over the roar of the rain.

 

It turned out not to be necessary, however, as before they made it to the treeline, the rain came to a sudden stop. They hadn’t heard a single lightning strike in the process. The sky was blue, it was sunny out, and they were already starting to dry out.

 

No longer needing to stop and wait for the weather to clear, they continued on to the first shelter. The campsite featured a lean-to for them to sleep in, as well as a hitching post for the horses. Spock followed Chris’s lead in getting the horses settled and ready to rest for the night. When they were secure, Spock headed off to refill his water reservoir.

 

After an uneventful, if wet, day, it seemed an opportune time to pull out the small stove Chris had brought along and cook some hot food. With consideration to Spock’s vegetarianism, Chris had opted to bring vegetarian-only meals so they could share on the trail. Dinner tonight featured noodles and a green sauce of some kind, cooked via boiling water, purified with one of the purification tablets Dr. Boyce gave him while he was packing.

 

As he boiled the water, Chris sat back and considered how similar this was to what people had done on this trail for centuries. How many other people, in the past two or three hundred years, had sat in this same spot, cooking and eating their trail-packed food? Had hitched their horses on these same posts, and sent their companions to fetch some water?

 

For once in his life, Chris felt connected to something much larger than himself or Starfleet, instead feeling the entirety of human history joining him to this spot, this moment in time. He was insignificant in that moment, and the weight of that insignificance was a relief unlike any he had experienced before.

 

***

 

The next several days were about as close to ideal as Chris and Spock could ask for. It turned out that the rain of the first afternoon was a regular occurrence in this part of the world, with a five minute shower, ranging from a few drops to a downpour, starting at 0300 every day and ending by 0305. They could practically set their watches to it.

 

They were on their fifth day on the trail as of this morning, and with all the good weather and easy riding they’d done, it seemed like their trip was going to be just as relaxing and enjoyable as Chris had promised from the beginning. Over the past two days, in particular, they had summitted three mountains, with the campsite on the first night placed near the top of the second peak. The view was breathtaking, and Spock was quite certain they were the only people around for miles.

 

These mountains were also the first they’d found that had other people climbing them. Hikers, mostly, with big packs moving swiftly past the two men and horses. Talking to them, Spock came to understand that Chris’s ‘no-tech’ rule wasn’t the exception; many people hiking these remote areas were insistent that they minimize how much modern tech they bring with them on their journeys.

 

Spock still didn’t pretend to understand it, but now at least he could chalk it up to cultural differences, rather than an attempt at getting them killed.

 

Today started out much the same as the previous. It was a sunny morning, if a bit chilly, and they were finally descending from the mountain tops into a valley. There was a lake in the distance, their destination for the day, and they were making good time down the mountain.

 

Before they knew it, it was lunchtime and they were stopping to eat on a rocky outcrop, overlooking the valley they were rapidly heading towards. By now, they had exhausted their usual topics of conversation, and were spending more time in silence, simply enjoying each other’s company.

 

And as luck would have it, that silence was what allowed Spock to hear it.

 

He thought it was a deer, at first. An elk, maybe. Turning to get a look at their new visitor, he didn’t see anything in the trees behind them. Spock continued watching the woods for a moment, but when he didn’t hear the sound again, he turned back to his lunch.

 

“Everything alright, Spock?”

 

“I thought I heard something. A deer, maybe.”

 

“Probably ran off when it noticed us. As long as it’s not a bear, we’re fine.”

 

It wasn’t a bear. Or, for that matter, a deer. Which was how they ended up in their current situation, tied up and sitting the rocks they’d been enjoying their lunch on, while two young people, masked and armed, untied Tango and Mary Lou.

 

“My name is Captain Christopher Pike, and this is Lieutenant Spock,  _ USS Enterprise _ . This theft won’t go unnoticed. We’ll be found, and so will the horses.”

 

“Shut up, Starfleet.” One of the thieves responded. The voice sounded male, though Spock couldn’t be sure. “Besides, how will anyone know there are horses missing if they don’t know that the riders are missing, too?”

 

“A Starfleet captain, failing to return to his ship? This whole mountain range will be full of people looking for us.”

 

“And maybe, if they’re very lucky, they’ll find your bodies. Well, if the animals don’t get to them first.” The thief pulled a phaser from the holster at his side. Spock didn’t feel the sting of the blast, just heard the now-familiar whinny of Mary Lou as the world faded to black.

 

***

 

The first thing Spock noticed when he came back to consciousness was water hitting his face. The sun was high in the sky, not a cloud in sight, but rain was sprinkling as had done every day so far up in the mountains. He blinked his eyes open, cringing at the bright light of the sun.

 

Pulling one arm in front of his face as his eyes readjusted to the sunlight, he braced his other arm behind him to help him sit up.

 

“Captain, what-”

 

And that was when he realized he was alone. Chris was no longer on the outcropping with him. The horses were gone, their gear was gone. Even, he noted, the hat Chris had loaned him the day before to keep the harsh sunlight off his fair skin was missing.

 

Panic did not overtake him, and if he’d had a moment to think about it, he would have been grateful for his Vulcan teachings, allowing him to keep calm under distress. Instead, he pushed himself to his knees, and then used a large rock beside him to pull himself to standing.

 

He felt weak, like standing on his own wouldn’t be a possibility for a while. Common with a blast from a phaser set to stun, but still a struggle he didn’t need to deal with at the moment.

 

Instead, he focused on looking around for evidence of his captain.

 

“Captain!” He called, waiting several seconds for a response before calling, “Chris!”

 

But there was no response. Breathing hard and continuing to lean on the stone surface next to him, he took a moment to collect his thoughts.

 

_ He was sitting beside me. Tied up. I’m not tied up now, so they must have shot me and then untied me. Perhaps they did the same to him? They wouldn’t have taken him with them, that would have been too conspicuous if they met anyone else on the trail. _

 

_ Which means they most likely either left him here, or they separated us and killed him? Stunned him? _

 

Looking back over to the ledge they had been sitting on earlier, Spock held back a flinch.

 

_ Or they threw him over the edge _ .

 

There was only one way to find out. Spock pushed himself away from the rock he’d been leaning on and took a step towards the ledge.

 

Only to fall on the ground again. The phaser wound, which he hadn’t noticed before, in his focus on the captain, was now intensely painful. Back on the ground, he pressed his left hand to the wound and closed his eyes, waiting for the world to stop spinning and his lunch to stay where he put it.

 

When finally he felt like the vertigo and nausea had reached an equilibrium, he opted to move slowly and close to the ground to reach the ledge. It didn’t matter whether the captain was at the base or not, if Spock fell over the edge in a fit of dizziness, they didn’t have a chance in hell of getting out of here.

 

Considering the urgency of his mission, and that he was only a few meters from his destination, the several minutes it took him to get that far felt entirely too long, complicated by the intense pain in his side and the short shallow breaths he needed to take to prevent the pain from flaring.

 

By the time he made it to the edge of the rock, he was exhausted and breathing hard, barely able to see with the intensity of the pain in his side. He took a few slow, deep breaths, trying to ground himself as his mother had taught him to as a child, and when pain subsided, he pulled himself over so he could see the drop below him.

 

It was about twenty feet to the ledge below the one Spock was currently clutching, and right there, out of reach and still unconscious, was his captain. He was on his front, left arm in an awkward position that suggested to Spock that it may be broken.

 

Moving back from the ledge, Spock sat up and considered how to rescue Chris. There were a few trees, and certainly there may be handholds in the rock, but Spock doubted that either of them were well enough to do any climbing.

 

He’d have to find another way.


	4. Chapter 4

As Spock contemplated his current situation, he heard footsteps and voices approaching from behind him. Forcing himself back to a standing position, he prepared himself for the possibility of a fight.

 

A moment later, as the hikers came into view, Spock visibly relaxed.

 

“Afternoon!” One of the two young women, hiking with a large overnight backpack, greeted him with a smile.

 

“Good... Afternoon.” Spock struggled to speak, suddenly aware that he was wearing a shirt covered in green Vulcan blood.

 

“Oh my god, what happened to you? Are you alright? Do you need help?” The other woman gasped, speeding up her steps as she turned and approached him.

 

“We were... attacked. Thieves took our horses. My companion... is down there, on the ledge below this one. I’m not sure how to rescue him.” Spock didn’t realize how much effort it would take him to speak until now, as he breathed heavily between words.

 

“Kat, you still have that anti-grav unit, right? What’s the weight allowance on that thing?” The woman who had approached him turned toward her companion, Kat, as she took off her backpack and started digging through it.

 

“Good question, Martha. Maybe three hundred pounds?” And then to Spock, Kat said, “I think we can lift him, if he’s not too heavy or too badly injured.”

 

“He weighs approximately 180lbs. I suspect his left arm may be broke, and he likely has a phaser wound as well.”

 

“You’re in luck, then. I’m only about 120, we’ll be right around the weight allowance. I’ll be careful with the arm, but no guarantees with the phaser blast.” Kat was talking to him and she attached the anti-gravity boots to her feet. While the trail was frequented by hikers with a disdain for modern technology, there were also a few side trails that led to cliffs that could only be explored via anti-grav.

 

Kat moved to the ledge and started lowering herself down, while Martha turned to Spock. “We’ve been taking day-hikes and a couple overnights since we got up here a couple days ago, but we were exploring the cliff over by Muir Lake yesterday, and Kat has a bad tendency to forget to clean out her pack from day to day. You’re lucky she didn’t bother to take them out last night; it’s a couple days’ hike yet to the town up ahead, and we’ve been slow going after I rolled my ankle a couple days ago.”

 

“I appreciate your assistance. Do you by chance have a comm unit I could borrow?”

 

“I wish. We discovered ours broke last night. We don’t have the tools or parts to fix it. And anyway, we’re here to rough it, not to be coddled by technology. We didn’t even think that we’d realistically need it out here”

 

“I’m not certain that Chris and I will be able to make the hike into town.” Spock said, wondering if perhaps the only way to get to help would be to tough it out and make the hike anyway.

 

“When we’re done getting your friend back up here, we’ll hike ahead and alert the authorities, okay? Oh, and expect a lecture about trail safety when they meet you. They’re not big fans of us all going off without working comm equipment or anything.”

 

“Of course. Thank you.”

 

Kat hadn’t reappeared yet, and Spock was started to wonder what was taking her so long. He started to walk towards the ledge again, but Martha put a hand on his arm. “They’ll be back up in moment. Give them space, so she has a place to put him down when she gets back up here.”

 

“It seems to be taking a while. Perhaps Kat needs assistance.”

 

“No, things are just slow going because the anti-grav isn’t built to handle heavy weights well. And she has to get them both balanced just right so she can go straight up without tilting or anything. They’ll be fine, just give them time.”

 

And so they waited, Martha keeping her hand on Spock’s arm. Spock considered shrugging it off, but it had the intended effect, and he stayed at her side while they listened for any indication of the progression of the other two.

 

***

 

After nearly an hour, and several tries, Spock could see Kat’s head hovering near the ground, the rest of her still below the view from his position near the trail. A few more minutes passed, and finally, after what felt like forever but Spock knew logically was only a short time, Martha was telling him to stay still while she moved forward and helped her friend manipulate Chris’s body onto the ledge.

 

As soon as his body was on the ground, Spock was running, ignoring the sharp pain in his side, and the dizziness threatening to overwhelm him.

 

He came to a stop beside his captain, kneeling beside him and throwing his body over the prone form. The dim and distant voice of Kat barely registered in his ears as he pulled his body away from Martha’s hands.

 

No one would keep his captain from him again.

 

Instead, he reached his hand up and felt along Chris’s neck for a pulse. Gentle fingers found the point and Spock deepened his breaths, registering more the cadence of the pulse than taking any specific measurement.

 

_ He’s alive. _

 

The thought rang through his head, and for the first time since he was a small child, Spock lost control of his telepathy.

 

It was just a second, just long enough to reach out to Chris’s consciousness and convey the overwhelming sense of relief Spock felt at his friend’s survival. But it was too much, and as he realized what he had done, he withdrew.

 

Not just from Chris’s consciousness, but away from his body as well.

 

_ Inappropriate. Illogical. An emotional response is bad enough but to carelessly inflict that on another person is even worse. A failure of a Vulcan. As always. _

 

Deep breaths. Regain control. As fast as his thoughts spiralled away from him, memories of his mother’s voice teaching him not to panic in the face of his human emotions pulled them back in.

 

He couldn’t be a mess right now. Chris needed his help.

 

Speaking of Chris, he appeared to have regained consciousness. After Spock had thrown himself backward, Martha and Kat moved forward to check on the man Kat worked so hard to rescue. He was now sitting up, clearly uncomfortable with the strangers around him, confused as to what had happened, and clearly in pain.

 

He was also looking around wildly, moving his head this way and that. Spock thought at first that he was trying to get his bearings, believing that he had been kidnapped as the thieves had threatened, but then the two of them locked eyes and Chris’s head stilled.

 

“Spock.” It was barely more than a breath. Now that they were still and pointing in his direction, Spock could tell how distant the look in Chris’s eyes were. 

 

“Captain.” Spock stood up and walked toward him, bracing himself for more accidental contact so he didn’t reinitiate the telepathic link he didn’t have permission for in the first place.

 

Off to the side, Kat and Martha stood together silent, watching the two men watch each other. “Um, hey, guys? It was nice to meet you both and help out, but we’re going to get going now, okay? We have to reach the next camp by tonight if we want to make it to town tomorrow. When we get there, we’ll let them know you need help, okay? It’s the best we can do.”

 

“Thank you for your assistance.” Spock said with an air he usually reserved for overeager ensigns, not bothering to look at the two women.

 

In the background, Spock could hear the two of them grab their packs and start heading off. He paid them no mind, instead keeping his focus on Chris.

 

“Your arm looks broken. And I’m guessing the stain on your shoulder is from the phaser wound. Given the dilation of your pupils, a concussion is likely as well. Have you sustained any other injuries?”

 

“I’m okay, Spock. Where are the horses?”

 

“You are not okay.”

 

“And you didn’t answer my question. I’m fine. The arm hurts a bit, but I don’t need that to go for a walk. What supplies do we have?”

 

Spock was about to remind him that they had no supplies, they had been attached to the horses, and therefore stolen with them. Instead, he followed Chris’s gaze to a point past his shoulder, discovering a small pile of supplies waiting for them. He stood up and walked over to it.

 

_ From their packs _ . Spock realized, recognizing a water bladder Martha had pulled out while they were looking for the anti-grav boots. In addition, they had left a small daypack, a couple bags of food, a large thermal blanket, and a small, bright red, first aid kit.

 

Not much, but it could be the difference between dying in the woods or making it back to civilization.

 

He told Chris as much, as well as what had been left for them.

 

“Fantastic. At least now we’ll be warm when the bears get to us.”

 

Spock chose to ignore the fatalistic humor and instead focused on the task at hand. “Can you stand?”

 

“I can try. Give me a hand?” Chris’s left hand and arm were curled against his body, but he reached his right hand out to grasp Spock’s. Spock braced himself, pulling Chris up into a standing position and preparing to catch the captain in case he fell.

 

“I’m fine, Spock. The forest is spinning and my arm hurts like hell, but I’m not dead yet, okay? Let’s get going.”

 

Chris managed no more than two steps, small, cautious shuffles, before dropping to one knee. He curled in on himself, eyes clenched shut.

 

“Perhaps we should wait for help,” Spock said.

 

“We have to go, Spock. Every minute we sit here is another minute Tango and Mary Lou are in the hands of those assholes. Give me a minute and I’ll be ready to go.”

 

“I am aware. However, we are both badly injured, and neither of us are well enough for long distance travel on foot. The sun is setting and we are not prepared to last through nightfall in the middle of the woods. Where we are now is our best option through tonight and if we can rest, we can start early tomorrow.”

 

“You’re going to be stubborn about this, aren’t you?”

 

“I am merely suggesting the most logical course of action given the current situation.”

 

Spock’s Vulcan ears picked up a comment that sounded almost like “Vulcan logic my ass,” under Chris’s breath, but opted to ignore it. Instead, he offered his shoulder to his captain, allowing the man to hold on so that the two of them could move together along the rock face that Spock felt like he’d spent most of his day. After depositing Chris against it, Spock retrieved the pile of supplies, laying the blanket over Chris and offering him one of the bags of food.

 

Chris took it and grabbed a handful of whatever was in it - trail mix, he discovered, once he’d pulled his hand out. Spock took a handful as well, and they ate their meager dinner slowly.

 

“We’re going to have to share tonight, you know. It’ll be colder at night without a lean-to and our sleeping bags.”

 

“I should be able to retain enough heat with meditation that I will not need the blanket.” Spock replied. He grabbed the two bags of food and laid them in the bottom of the daypack.

 

“What, you don’t want to share a blanket with me? Don’t like sharing a bed with another man, or don’t like sharing with your captain?”

 

“You need it more. The most logical course of action would be-”

 

“Spock? I don’t need you dying of hypothermia tonight, okay? Just get under the damn blanket with me.”

 

“If you insist.” Spock continued packing what little they had into the bag, intending to stow it in a crevice for the night and then have it ready for the next morning.

 

Chris watched him for a long moment. His eyes tracked Spock’s hands as they disappeared into the bag, shifting and reorganizing as Spock considered the more optimal arrangement.

 

“You know, ever since Talos IV, I’ve felt off,” Chris began. “For a long time I wondered if maybe I was still there, that my whole life was an illusion.”

 

Spock’s hands stilled, but he kept his focus on the bag.

 

“A few months later, do you remember that landing party? When I got stabbed in the chest? It was the first time I felt alive, really alive, since Talos. And more than that, I knew that this was real. All of it.

 

“The pain was the give away. When I was on Talos, and they would...  _ punish _ me, it felt incredibly real, like it was actually happening. But then, feeling that blade sink into my skin, it was so obvious to me that what I had experienced on Talos wasn’t anything like the real thing. 

 

“Since then, it’s been such a struggle to keep my head on straight. Some days I can’t for the life of me convince myself that I’m living reality. I think of stealing a phaser from the armory, or a laser knife. I don’t want to die, I just want to know I’m alive. But every time I think to do it, every time I think  _ oh, I’ll just go after shift, no one will know _ , Boyce knows. I don’t know how he knows, but he does, and he shows up in my quarters with that bottle of whiskey and that wild look on his face - you know the one - and he tells me to drink myself to oblivion.

 

“Can you believe a damn doctor advising you to drink yourself to death instead of just prescribing you something to stop the symptoms? I don’t know why he doesn’t, or why he was so convinced I needed to go on this trip, or why he forced you on it with me. It’s almost like he thinks that you and I spending time out here will somehow get my head on straight. To be fair, I have a feeling he’s at the end of his rope with me, and god knows he’s not a psychologist and doesn’t know what to do with my head, but still...”

 

Chris faded off, his eyes meeting Spock’s, who had looked up to listen to his captain. Shaking his head, Chris sighed, biting his lip and closing his eyes at the weight of his thoughts.

 

Spock considered Chris’s words, and then, with a deliberation that he would typically reserve for a scared animal or a small child, he reached out and placed his hand on top of Chris’s. He ran his thumb along the edge of Chris’s fingers, intending only to comfort his friend in much the way his mother had him when he was a small child.

 

Chris took a deep breath at the sensation of Spock’s hand over his, looking up into the other man’s eyes with more clarity than he’d had all afternoon. Spock met his gaze, and was surprised and overwhelmed to find a deeper connection there.

 

Any time a Vulcan touches someone with their bare hands, there is a possibility, however remote, to establish a telepathic connection. Most of the time, it is initiated by choice by the Vulcan, with consent from the other being if they are so capable. Spock had done this with Mary Lou, establishing the connection from his end. However, he was familiar with Vulcans and other, non-telepathic beings forming bonds so deep that the non-Vulcan could initiate the connection upon physical contact as well.

 

He had seen such a technique used, though rarely, between his own parents. As Vulcans did not often form close bonds with members of other species, Sarek and Amanda’s relationship was the foundation of his knowledge on the topic.

 

Now, however, he felt Chris’s consciousness, the familiar blue he remembered from the touch he had felt of it in Mary Lou’s head only a few days before, reaching out over the connection formed by their hands, and Spock was hit with a complex wave of emotion that nearly sent him reeling.

 

_ Fear pain anger love hurt sorrow comfort confusion fear  _ **_love_ **

 

Spock collected himself and met the consciousness pushing into his with a wall of  **_calm_ ** , as strong and gentle as he could, waiting out the onslaught until it subsided. Taking a moment to reassess their physical beings, he noticed Chris had turned his hand over, and was now had a rock-hard grip on Spock’s hand, fingers intertwined. After minute, as Spock continued to maintain his calm, Chris’s hold loosened, though he didn’t pull his hand away.

 

Returning his focus to the bond, Spock reached out himself now, meeting Chris’s force halfway. In the foreground, the confusion over what was happening. In the background, intense, overwhelming love.

 

And then, something more.

 

_ I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m- _

 

Spock cut him off.  _ You do not need to apologize. I am unharmed. Come here _ .

 

Enveloping his captain’s consciousness with his own, Spock gave the telepathic equivalent of an embrace, overwhelming the confusion and fear that had previously threatened to overwhelm the bond. He then reached out to the love he felt with some of his own. Smaller, more controlled, but still apparent in its form.

 

If you asked his mother, Amanda Grayson would tell you without hesitation that the one thing she had attempted to impart on her son, more than anything else, was a very human understanding and feeling of love.

 

If you asked Spock, he would deny it entirely. But that was just because he’d inherited his father’s stubborn, stoic Vulcan demeanor.

 

Now there was nothing to deny. Spock settled into the embrace, the love between them, until he felt the lingering negative emotions that had previous settled between the two of them fade. Once all he experienced was love from the bond, he drew back, feeling Chris’s consciousness chase his for a second before drawing itself back as well.

 

Back in the physical realm, Chris was smiling at Spock, the tracks of tears betraying the overwhelming emotions he no longer experienced, at least for a moment. Their hands were still clasped together, but neither was reaching out any longer. 

 

“What the hell was that, Spock? Some kind of weird mind meld?”

 

“Not exactly. A mind meld is deeper. This bond a common experience between pairs who form close bonds. Friends, lovers, family.”

 

“Ah. I see.”

 

“It is not absurd to believe that it could form between a captain and a trusted senior officer.”

 

“We just went through all that and you won’t even call me a friend?” Chris laughed.

 

Spock had heard similar words before, but they were typically from human women, and usually with more anger behind them. Unlike in those instances, though, this time he conceded. 

 

“Indeed, a friend.”

 

“I’ll take it.”

  
Spock had no way to tell what time it was, but night had fallen and both men were exhausted, so Spock did as promised and pulled the blanket over himself, careful not to hog any away from Chris. They fell asleep, side by side, on their bed of rocks and browned pine needles.


	5. Chapter 5

Chris awoke the next morning to sight of mountains, illuminated by the morning sun. Spock had shifted in his sleep, wrapping himself around Chris and effectively pinning him to the ground.

 

He wasn’t going to complain. The air was cold on his face, and Spock’s body was exuding more than enough heat to keep them both warm.

 

The past two days had been one hell of a mess, and last night had been more revolutionary than Chris could have imagined. On Talos IV, the Talosians had been right, he was attracted to Vina, Commander Una, and the Yeoman. He wouldn’t deny that. 

 

But attraction and love are two different things, and though he was sure there was an alternate universe where he fell in love with Vina and stayed with her forever, he was also sure that this universe wasn’t it.

 

There was no starfleet regulation against a captain dating a subordinate, as long as everything was on the up and up. He’d even flirted occasionally with a few of his officers, making sure everyone knew it was just for fun and that no feelings were hurt.

 

Spock had never been included in that. Vulcans were... different, and Chris hadn’t wanted anything lost in translation. He didn’t even know if Vulcan sexuality included a concept like queerness. Loving someone just to love them, Chris suspected, didn’t fit into Vulcan logic.

 

And anyway, Spock had a... mate. A woman named T’Pring. Chris had met her the last time they were on Vulcan, and his understanding was that the two of them had been bonded since childhood. Chris wasn’t going to interfere with that, regardless of what he might think about arranging marriages (sorry,  _ bonds _ ) between children.

 

Last night had changed his thinking, though, as Chris remembered the feelings of love Spock had sent between the telepathic link they had shared. They had been present, if not particularly intense by human standards. 

 

Relishing the comfort of his friend’s body against his, Chris reached up with his good hand and rubbed Spock’s back. It was an absentminded movement, the sort of thing he’d done with a number of women and men in his past, regardless of whether they’d slept together or not. Spock, for his part, didn’t seem to mind, shifting in his sleep to an even deeper position against Chris’s side.

 

They stayed like that as the sun continued to rise, the rays hitting mountains in a view so magnificent Chris couldn’t imagine that this was real life, and not an old Earth painting. He enjoyed the view as he waited for Spock to wake up, not wanting to disturb the rest he knew they both needed.

 

Nature had other plans, however, and eventually Chris knew he had to extricate himself from the warmth and comfort of his makeshift bed. Shifting sideways, with the hope of untangling himself from his octo-Vulcan without waking him, Chris managed to push his way free and sit up.

 

Whatever they had been hoping for by staying the night, any sort of healing or reduction in pain, was completely negated by the aches across Chris’s whole body. Did his broken arm hurt less? Yes, it did. At the expense of his entire back, hips, and neck. Yesterday he couldn’t move because of the dizziness and pain. Today, it was old age and a bed literally made out of rocks. Wincing, Chris braced himself with his good arm as he pushed himself into a standing position.

 

He wasn’t gasping for breath or falling over, so he made his way across the trail to the woods on the other side, finding a large pine tree that would allow him privacy while still keeping him close enough to hear Spock if he called. After taking care of business, he returned to the rock face to find Spock sitting up as well.

 

“You’re awake. Good morning.”

 

“I awoke when you left.”

 

“Sorry about that.”

 

“It is not a problem. Are you well enough to travel today?” Spock was looking over Chris with questioning eyes, looking for any indication that he might not be well enough to travel.

 

“I hurt, but I think I can go for a bit. We’ll just have to take frequent breaks. For  _ both _ of us.”

 

Spock nodded. He wasn’t about to tell Chris about the slight pain he was feeling in his left shoulder and arm, right where the phaser wound and break were on Chris’s own body. An extension of the bond from last night, he was sure. Instead, he made a note that if Chris’s pain returned, they may be able to try the bond again to reduce it. Or, more accurately, shift some of it to Spock.

 

He had a higher pain tolerance than his captain, anyway, so it wasn’t like it would be a large burden to share some of the pain. His own wound was painful, but wasn’t as severe as the injuries Chris had sustained. Spock felt well enough to carry the pack, at least, sparing Chris the struggle of carrying it with his broken arm. Grabbing it now and slinging it over his shoulders, the two men set off towards the next camp site.

 

“It’s five miles to the next lean-to, and then another ten to town. If Kat and Martha made their distance yesterday, they should be in town by tonight, and depending on when they contact emergency personnel regarding our condition and position, we may make contact by tonight or early tomorrow.”

 

“What’s the plan, Spock, make it to the lean-to and wait there?”

 

“Depending on how today goes, that may be the best course of action. Alternatively, we can proceed slowly today, and take advantage of the fewer miles to rest up and attempt to make it to town tomorrow.”

 

“You’re right, let’s wait and see how we’re doing after the five miles today, assuming we can make it that far.”

 

The two walked slowly, taking frequent breaks on the numerous waist-high stumps, logs, and rocks lining the trail. On the inclines, Chris didn’t hesitate to take hold of the small trees on either side of the trail, using them to help him move forward or rest as he needed. Spock flanked him on the other side, more watchful now after the previous days’ events. The last thing they needed was to run into more ruffians before they made it out of the woods and to safety.

 

They had been travelling for a while, nearly two hours, when Chris first stumbled and fell to the ground. He landed hard on his broken left arm, crying out in pain at the hit. Spock was at his side in second, reaching out to soothe him and help him up.

 

“It’s fine, I’m fine, Spock. Just landed on my bad arm,” Chris was already saying, quick to deny that the pain had been increasing ever since they’d started and eventually had distracted him.  _ No one can prove that I didn’t trip on the branch because I didn’t look where I was going _ .

 

Spock wasn’t having it, though. “Would you be willing to try something? I may be able to help ease your pain.”

 

“What? Spock, I thought you checked the med kit and there weren’t any drugs in there.”

 

“Not medicine. The bond we share. It would be like last night, but I would initiate it, and we would specifically target your pain. I will not do it, however, without your consent.”

 

“Of course, go ahead, anything to make it hurt less. Please.”

 

Spock lifted his hand, palm facing Chris, and Chris mirrored the action. When their hands touched, Spock reached out to the consciousness he had grown so familiar with last night.

 

_ Pain trust curiosity confusion _

 

Fewer emotions today, and less strong. Spock wondered offhand if all humans were like this, experiencing several emotions all at once, with head-spinning intensity. Especially considering they did not often seem to show all of their emotions externally. He couldn’t imagine how difficult and frustrating it must be to deal with them.

 

His attention, however, could not currently be on the human condition. Spock had a mission, and now he reached out toward the  _ pain _ he felt from Chris, meeting again with his own  _ calm _ . 

 

The reaction today was instant. Chris slumped forward, relaxing into the sensation. He came to rest with his head against Spock’s chest, stilling and allowing the Vulcan to break the link before dropping his hand.

 

“That was incredible, Spock. Thank you.”

 

“It is my pleasure to help.”

 

They got up and with a renewed energy, continued on the trail towards the camp. After a few minutes, Chris turned to Spock.

 

“Can I ask a question?”

 

“Of course.”

 

“You said that you never form a telepathic link with someone unless they consent. But, you didn’t ask last night? I didn’t mind it, I was just curious...”

 

“Indeed, I have pondered last night myself. I believe you were the one to form the bond between us then.”

 

“I’m not a telepath. How is that possible? I shouldn’t be able to form any telepathic bonds.”

 

“It is rare, but does occasionally happen. Between my parents, my human mother is able to initiate a link with my father, so long as they are touching. If you watch them work in a diplomatic setting together, you will often see them holding hands for that exact purpose.”

 

“Huh. So, what, I have a telepathic link with you because we have a good friendship?”

 

“I am uncertain. Further research is needed, but I suspect that it has not yet been done. Vulcans don’t often form such close bonds with non-telepaths, and such a question would not exist between two Vulcans.”

 

“Well, I’m sorry, for what it’s worth. I didn’t mean to... violate your mind, or anything.”

 

“No apology is necessary. You didn’t know what you were doing, and it seems the experience has proved beneficial.”

 

“Well, if you want to... continue exploring this bond, I certainly wouldn’t be opposed.”

 

The both stopped, just for a minute, and looked at each other. Silently, Spock reached out and took Chris’s hand in his, not reaching out with his telepathy, but acknowledging what they both knew: that the bond they spoke of was more than intellectual, but emotional, and perhaps one day, more physical as well.

 

They continued walking, speaking occasionally about Vulcan telepathy and their understanding of non-Vulcans as they wandered through the serene woods.

 

***

 

“What was that?” Chris asked. The two men had been walking for nearly five hours now, and though it had been slow going, they figured that they had to approaching the campsite soon enough. With frequent breaks, Spock estimated approximately a mile per hour pace on average, much slower than the three miles per hour he’d normally do with a human away team on a mission.

 

“A deer, perhaps?” Spock suggested.

 

“Last time you thought you heard a deer, it was horse thieves.”

 

“Less likely this time.”

 

“Oh?”

 

“We have no horses to steal.”

 

“Great, thanks for that overwhelming display of logic, Spock.”

 

Either way, they continued forward carefully and quietly, listening for the sound that had alerted Chris to another presence. It was only about a minute before they heard it again. They stopped to listen. Not a deer, but a voice.

 

“Captain Pike! Lieutenant Spock!” The shout was coming from in front of them on the trail. It was close enough to make out the words, and that it sounded male, but not close enough to tell who it was.

 

“Looks like help has arrived, Spock. Let’s go meet our rescuers.” Chris said, grinning. He returned the calls from in front of them, “Over here!”

 

No amount of excitement was going to improve their pace, but it didn’t matter; a few minutes after Chris answered his call, Philip Boyce was rounding the bend ahead of them in the trail with a medical kit in hand. Beside him were a police officer and a park ranger, both armed and on the lookout.

 

As they approached, the two officials took up positions to either side of the group, one opening a communicator to inform whomever was on the other end that their quarry had been found. She turned away as she spoke, and as Boyce started talking, Spock missed the rest of what the officer was saying.

 

“There you two are. This is the last time I let either of you off the damn ship.” Boyce said, pulling out a tricorder and scanning Chris with it. “Both of you, back to the ship. It’s going to be a while before I let you out of sick bay.”

 

“It’s just a broken arm, Doctor. And, if I may remind you, it was your idea that we take this trip. A trip you weren’t willing to join me on.”

 

“Yes, well, as long as it accomplished its intended purpose.”

 

“What purpose might that be? Care to inform your pawns, or are you planning to leave us in the dark?”

 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

 

“Spock tells me you had a hand in his decision to join me.”

 

“I plead the fifth,” Boyce said. “Boyce to Enterprise, I found them. Three to beam directly to sick bay.”

 

***

 

Spock was permitted to leave sick bay after only a few hours, having had his wound patched up by a nurse while Chris received a thorough examination from Boyce.

 

“A concussion, a broken arm, and a phaser wound. Jeez Chris, I thought you said a trail ride would be relaxing and fun,” Boyce was saying from his position next to Chris’s biobed, across the room from Spock.

 

“Hurry up, Doc. I still have to go back down and find Tango and Mary Lou.”

 

“No need. Once your friends made it to town and told the authorities there what happened, they were able to identify the two men who attacked you and took your horses. They’ve already been picked up and charged with horse theft, and your noble steeds are back in California with your nieces. Commander Una saw to their save recovery while I assisted in recovering  _ you _ . Now rest, I don’t like that you’ve been up and about so much with a concussion. How you haven’t been puking your guts out from all the pain is beyond me.”

 

Chris laughed. “A little old Vulcan medicine, Doc. Spock’s a miracle worker when he wants to be.”

 

Boyce shook his head and left Chris to sleep, returning to Spock’s side. “You’re clear to return to your quarters lieutenant, and you can return to duty whenever you’re ready. Keep in mind both of you still have a week’s worth of leave, if you’d like it. I’m sure you have plenty of work you’d like to dig into now that you’re home, though. Sector 59 and all that.”

 

“Yes, Doctor. I’m sure I can find an appropriate balance of work and pleasure for the duration.”

 

Boyce regarded Spock a moment, and then leaned in closer to him, dropping his voice so Chris couldn’t hear. “Look, between the two of us, I don’t know what that old Vulcan medicine is, but considering what you two went through out there, I wasn’t expecting the captain in such good spirits when I found him. Keep it up, alright? I don’t need to know, but if it keeps his head on straight...”

 

“It is my honor to serve the captain to the best of my ability, Doctor, in whatever capacity he so requires.”

 

“Yeah, whatever. Just remember to be careful with him until he’s fully healed, okay? Don’t want your Vulcan super strength to delay his own return to duty.”

 

“I have no intention of sparring the captain unless he’s fully healed, Doctor. I presume we’ll restart our regular sessions after the end of our leave.”

 

“I’m just saying, Spock, when you do...  _ spar _ , you be careful about it.”

 

Spock stared at the doctor, wondering for a moment if he should try to correct the older man’s assumptions about the state of Spock’s relationship with the captain. Deciding against it, for his own composure as well as the likelihood that it would make no difference to stubborn old Boyce, Spock opted instead with, “Of course, Doctor. I understand.”

 

Besides, the doctor wasn’t entirely wrong. Spock suspected he would be spending ample time with his captain in the coming days. And if there was a repeat of the night they spent sleeping curled up under the thermal blanket, with fewer injuries and a greater understanding of themselves and each other, Spock wasn’t going to be the one to protest.


End file.
